Thursday, March 10, 2016

A scare!

That was so weird.

There was an email from Blogorama saying they indexed my recent post ""Morning Joe" cuts off painful interview with Florida Governor for avoiding questions about Trump and Muslims" - wha?

So I check this blog, and mis-type the address. It doesn't load, and the anti-virus program is flagging the site, and I am in So. Much. Anguish thinking I've lost my blog to hijackers..

Then I notice the typo!

PHEW it still exists (not used since August last year? Oooops!!!)

Deep breath.

I head over to Blogorama and find out the blogs they have associated with that email were the today dot com ones that don't exist anymore, and haven't existed for many years. So told them to delete me/them from their directory.

All should be fine now.

.... but sheesh. That scared me.

Once upon a time I juggled another personality -- or rather, I allowed a part of me out more. The "writer/alter ego" part of me. The one who published deeply personal look-backs on my past (well before I ever started therapy and found out I needed to work through many suppressed emotions, memories of my childhood). The one who was as creative as could be, and had fun with a Tooth Fairy peeing on kids' mouths (seriously) in order to make their teeth rot. The one who had a great book idea, but realised she was actually rewriting her childhood and whatever did get written was never going to be published. Peeks into peeks into my creativity when those juices were flowing pretty well and I dared entertain the idea of being a writer. A while back, in order to consolidate/reduce number of things in general, whatever I posted as that persona, I unpublished, saved as draft to THIS blog, and deleted her home.

So if I had lost THIS blog, I would have lost HER work.
My work.
Her work.
I've not thought about her in a long time.

Hi Willow.

about two months later...

 ... hi again. This return to blogging is really not working out, is it? Actually, I am writing, three pages of mind vomit and affirmations ...