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Now to even it out a little...

Picking on Men

Q: What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground?
A: Shoot him again.

Q: How can you tell if a man is well-hung?
A: When you can barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.

Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: Because they are practicing to be men.

Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One - he just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him, or three - one to screw in the bulb and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part.

Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy.

Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

Q: Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm to fertilize one egg?
A: Because not one will stop and ask directions.

Q: Why do female black widow spiders kill their mates after mating?
A: To stop the snoring before it starts.

Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.

Q: What is the difference between men and women .. ?
A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need while a man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.

Q: How does a man keep his youth?
A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds.

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your email?
A: Rename the folder to 'Instruction Manuals'.

Muuahaaahahahahaahaaaahahahahahahahahaaa!!

Comments

  1. No, this was the "quality blog" of the day, lol. I like men - not a man hater - but this is frickin' funny.

    ReplyDelete
  2. hey, i like this. somewhat different from the norm blah stuff out there. cheers!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. hehehe, very funny. It's nice to know that u r fair and square to both genders..*wink*

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sumini: heehehe that's me... i kinda go out of my way to present / understand conflicting points of view :-D Much more fun when it's all humourous (as opposed to when I was working... so many people ingrained in their own ruts... ugh!!). btw thanx for stopping by! I check your blog quite often but haven't commented anything yet :p

    Samm: thanx for stopping by! I'm browsing your site right now - I certainly like what I see, & will be stopping by often :-) cheers!

    Sam: heehehe glad u like :-) there's just *so* much male/female-bashing fodder out there but in such good taste & humor it's a waste not to pass 'em on :-)

    ReplyDelete

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Thanks!
*lynne*

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